A Song
by Cryptic Dreams
Summary: Hermione and Ron learn something new about their friend...


A/N: The song in this fic is MEANT to be humorous and HIGHLY stupid. My friend and I just came up with it one day while talking on AIM. So please don't review and say, "What the heck, that's the stupidest thing ever, it makes no sense!" So, R/R, if you dare.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. My friend and I, however, DO own the song used. What a thing to own, huh? "Yeah, my friend and I wrote the song in this fic all on our own! Aren't we SO ingenious?!" Riiiiight...  
  
~~~  
  
"Rough day, Harry?" Ron asked Harry Potter, his best friend, as they walked towards the Gryffindor common room.  
  
"Yeah, I don't think I did well on my Potions or Transfiguration exams today. I think I'm just going to take a shower and then go straight to bed."  
  
"I understand, mate. Go and rest. I'll keep everybody in line while you're away." Ron proudly protruded his chest, making his Head Boy badge stand out even more.  
  
Harry laughed. "I'm sure you will, Ron."  
  
When they got into the common room, Harry went upstairs to their room, and Ron began a game of wizard's chess with Hermione.  
  
After about five minutes, Hermione and Ron's ears were caught by the sound of singing. They were the only ones who could hear it; so many years of sneaking around the castle at night had made their sense of hearing more acute than others'. It sounded like a girl, probably a first year or something, singing in a high-pitched voice. The two couldn't distinguish the lyrics.  
  
"What's THAT? It sounds horrible!" Ron wondered.  
  
"Ron, that's not nice! The poor girl can't help that she can't sing very well. She probably doesn't know that we can hear her. Hold on, I'll go upstairs and see where exactly it's coming from."  
  
"And make sure you tell the 'poor girl' to shut up while you're up there!" Ron called after Hermione. She just shook her head in exasperation.  
  
The voice continued to sing, and Ron covered his ears from the horrible noise. "Gosh, it sounds like a cat dying!"  
  
After a few minutes, Ron saw Hermione come back down the stairs. "Hermione, she's still singing! I thought you were going to shut her up!" he said.  
  
"Okay, FIRST of all, Ron, I wasn't going to tell her to shut up. That wouldn't have been courteous. And secondly... It's not coming from the girls' dorms..."  
  
"What?! Then where's it coming from? You don't think it's from someone in the halls or something, do you?"  
  
"No, the song's definitely coming from someone in Gryffindor..."  
  
"Whoa, wait, what are you instituting?" Ron asked, bewildered.  
  
"Okay, the word is 'insinuating,' Ron."  
  
"Whatever," Ron answered, embarrassed. He had been trying to impress Hermione with his "vast" vocabulary. "What are you INSINUATING, then?"  
  
"I'm assuming that these sounds are coming from the BOYS' dorms... Let's go and see."  
  
"Yeah, let's check it out," Ron agreed.  
  
As they climbed the stairs that led to the boys' dorm, the singing became louder and louder. When they got to the end of the hall, to the seventh year boys' room, Ron and Hermione were able to hear some of the words. They could hear the words "dragon," "Draco," and "cake-o" float into the hallway. Confusion took over their faces.  
  
"Let's go inside..." Hermione suggested.  
  
The two opened the door, intensifying the song. They walked over to the door of the seventh year boys' bathroom so that they could hear the song more clearly. "Is that Har--?" Ron asked, with his mouth hanging open.  
  
"Shh! Listen!" Hermione whispered.  
  
The words could be heard perfectly now, even though the running water sounds were mingled with them. Ron and Hermione listened carefully to the words coming out of the seventh year boys' bathroom:  
  
"Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
You make my heart quake-o!  
  
When I think of you, I shake-o!  
  
You are my dragon, my Draco!  
  
You're not a vampire, so I won't kill you with a stake-o!  
  
Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
I really want to take-o  
  
You to my house!  
  
I would love to be able to make-o  
  
You some dinner!  
  
We could even eat some steak-o!  
  
Afterwards I could bake-o  
  
You a chocolate cake-o!  
  
Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
We could go swimming in the lake-o!  
  
Out at the lake-o  
  
We might see a drake-o!  
  
You could save me from a venomous snake-o!  
  
Because you are my Draco!  
  
Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
But then we would find out that that snake-o  
  
Was all just a fake-o!  
  
Put there by some kid named Jake-o!  
  
All for his own sake-o!  
  
And so you would break-o  
  
His face in!  
  
Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
And then you would help me rake-o  
  
My yard for me!  
  
And you must remember that my Ford Anglia's brake-o  
  
Doesn't work!  
  
So if you end up crashing it, remember to get Macco!  
  
Dracoooo, Draaaaaaaco, Dracoooooo, Draaaaaacoooooooo!  
  
Myyyyyyyyyyyy Draaaaaaaacooooooooo!!!!!!!"  
  
Ron and Hermione looked at each other with matching looks of horror on their faces. When the running water stopped sounding, the two slowly opened the door, revealing Harry in a towel (tied up at his chest in a very queer way). A shrill, girly screech escaped Harry's lips when he saw his two friends standing there. His whole face turned red as Ron and Hermione stared at him, silent and appalled. They just backed out of the room, just as slowly as they had entered.  
  
Harry Potter never forgot to lock the bathroom door ever again.  
  
~~~  
  
See? Craziness and randomness. ...BUT REVIEW ANYWAY!! OR I WILL.. UM.. HYPNOTIZE YOU SO THAT YOU HEAR THE BACKSTREET BOYS IN YOUR HEAD OVER AND OVER AGAIN! IT WILL NEVER END! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA!! ...So review! *smiles sweetly* ^_^ 


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